Petunia rambles on and on….

I believe in protecting my family. Anybody that knows me knows how fierce I can be protecting my kids when necessary. I was considered an “over-protective freak” by one person and hardly ever let the kids out of my sight when they were young. I managed to get all 3 of them through their childhoods and to adult status with no major injuries, maiming and with all original parts working and intact. Certainly, part of this was luck; I’m aware of that, but a good part was due to my vigilance and hysterical worrying protective instincts.

It’s all over, though. No more Family Protection. It’s done. Gone. Deleted. Nada. You’re all on your own now. Extended family, too. Never again.

I guess it all started about 2 years ago, when we switched from one ISP – Internet Service Provider – to another. The former one was increasing their rates faster than my employer was raising mine. I haggled with them a few times, bargaining over the package deal that I had which included internet service, television service and a land line telephone. They offered me 6 free months of 2 premium channels, to stay with their company. I said No – that in 6 months, the bill would jump up astronomically and I’d have a heart attack when I opened it. And I really didn’t want to get used to or start enjoying something I couldn’t afford to keep, something that I would really  miss when it had to be cancelled. So Former Company and I went around a few times, with them offering me Plan B for $25 off for the next 6 months, and then Plan C where they offered $20 off for 12 months. Finally, their Customer Service Rep said, ‘No more.” There were no more “deals” that they could offer me to stay with their company and I’d just have to swallow the most recent rate hike.

That’s the day I called Verizon and requested a service hook-up for the next day off I could arrange. Included in the package I ordered was FIOS service for the TV which was a hell of an improvement over what we had a land line phone, and internet service. The tech that was here deleted the old Brand X security software that was on my computer and installed McAfee Security Suite, which comes with the internet package. He asked a few questions as he was doing it, and told me about what the programs did. Duh! I did not bother to tell him that I was using computers before he was using the potty dependably. He explained all the components I was getting and I nodded politely and looked somewhat like I was interested. I told him I would update the other systems here.

I had no problems with the service in all this time. None. Almost 2 damn years.

One day last week, I booted up my laptop while the coffee perked. (Uh, I guess it really doesn’t perk at all anymore; it just drips out!) Sat down with a fresh cup and went to open a browser to see what catastrophes had occurred in the world, assuming the world still existed.

I was BLOCKED. On my own computer. What?  This was worse than AF security, where you just couldn’t get to “certain” sites. I couldn’t get anything! I have Yahoo.com as my home page and couldn’t get that!! WTF???? And then I read the dialog box that’s showing.

McAfee Family Protection has blocked you from reaching this site.

I had this happen a few times before, and the cure was to simply restart the system. Which I did the other day. About 4 times. No help. Profanity didn’t help, either. My first thought was to simply take the computer off-line, delete the entire McAfee package, go out to Verizon and re-load it, which I certainly know how to do. BUT my concern was the number of computers I have, the number of downloads I’ve used. We’re running 3 right now, a desktop and 2 lappies and one is a replacement of an expired laptop. It would look to them that I’m currently using 4 copies and going out for #5. I was concerned that there might be a copy-limit, and I might not be able to re-load another one – and not find that out until after I deleted what I had!

So…. nothing else for it but to call Tech Support. Phone company training, no matter how long ago, requires that I get a tablet and a working pen before I pick up the phone. Knowing how this was likely to go, I also got a cold Coors Light. I got the recorded phony voice that asks questions and somewhat directs me to the right department – as a telephone operator all my life, this up’s my “pissed-off-ness” another 8 points higher as I wonder how many people lost their jobs when this shit was installed and how many company executives are flying around to their fancy vacations in private jets on the money saved. I was on hold long enough to need another beer. Hideous, loud music that actually hurt my ears, but didn’t want to have the phone too far away, in case someone actually did answer, didn’t get a response from a caller in 3 nanoseconds and disconnected me. There I sat, cussing and drinking his my beer.

Finally, I get a human. Who spoke English. A Verizon rep. I advised him of the problem that I had, that after 2 years of faithful service, McAfee turned on me this morning and locked me out of the house! Asked him if there was a way they could unlock the Family Protection. If not, would I have an issue downloading another copy of the software? They had my user name/password on file and it didn’t work. Rather than delete and re-install, they suggested and did transfer me to McAfee Tech Support, contracted to Verizon, I assume. Another lengthy wait. Fortunately, Himself had put plenty of beer in the refrigerator!

The McAfee specialist finally answers – I guess it takes a long time for his voice to get here from wherever the hell he is, but it certainly seemed like another tech support job had been sent out of this country and to another place on the other side of the world. I had to ask him 4 different times to SLOW DOWN whatever he was jabbering about – again, I’ve spent most of my working years on the phone and am very used to dealing with folks with foreign accents. But hell, McAfee, when you are providing tech support to customers in the US, you really need to hire folks that speak English clearly enough to be understood over a telephone, which exaggerates any accents or speech impediments.

Must admit that after we were able to communicate slowly using a 3rd grade vocabulary, the man “knew his shit” but it was a long time getting there. After I got him to slow down, I explained my issue, and requested that the Family Protection part of the package be fixed or deleted. He proceeded to give me a bit of a lecture on the unseemly sites that are out there, my responsibilities to young children and that he was against removing the very good and most necessary part of their Security Suite.

I was ready to go off on him, but instead, I patiently explained a few things to the gentleman, mentioned a few different numbers to him, like the ages of my wee children that he thought I should STILL be protecting. He rather grudgingly complied with my wishes and deleted files.

So kids, no Family Protection here. Come on over, bring your laptops, connect into my wi-fi as always and surf the porn sites. I’ll just look the other way or stay out in the kitchen.

Found this today over on Facebook, liked the sentiment, cleaned up the copy in PhotoShop.

We’re not really asking for that much, guys.

And your lives would be a whole lot better if you got onboard.

We promise!

When I was digging around for something or cleaning or tripping over things, whatever, I found a still-sealed bag of 10 skeins of Cascade 220 Superwash in colorway Amethyst Heather – 10 damn skeins!!! I remember buying it in a yarn store down near Kate’s, and I put it away until just the right pattern jumped out at me. And then something got put on it, or in front of it, and then I got an order from KnitPicks, and then it was time to cook dinner. And we all know the way my mind hops around like a hyperactive cricket. And the way I forget things. Gone. Like it never happened.

So when I found the bag, I watched it for a few days. And after a week or so it started talking to me. I kept hearing it say, “Sweater. I need to be a sweater.” And we all know that when wool starts talking to you, you gotta listen. Really.

I’ve really been thinking a lot about sweater patterns. And how much I hate to seam knitted goods. So it has to something seamless or nearly so. I have no patience with seaming; must be that hyper-cricket syndrome again. Thought of the February Lady Sweater. Nice, top-down, seamless construction. But I’ve already made it twice. First, in a deep green as a Christmas gift for my daughter-in-law – blondes look good in green. A red one for me. Do I really want to do it again? No.

So I started hunting for a pattern that the wool would like, something that would make it shut up. That yammering in the background was driving me crazy. I searched through countless books and magazines here that are stored in The Room of Shame my crafts/knitting/spinning room. Either I don’t have the right pattern or I do have it and just can’t find it. I turned to Ravelry and its Search function. Had to be knitted, worsted weight yarn, seamless, cardigan. Ravelry weeds out what doesn’t suit and came back with 2 zillion choices. Well, eliminate baby sweaters, men’s sweaters. Eventually, I got it down to a manageable level of patterns to look through. Oddly, when I first saw THE PATTERN, I didn’t think that much of it. Didn’t like the color on the picture. It looked blah. And the model looked, well, like she didn’t like the sweater. Now those are dumb reasons not to like a pattern. But after going through what was available a few times, I smartened up and looked at it with a wee bit of intelligence and realized that it really is a neat pattern.

Settled, happily, on Tea Leaves Cardigan on the Madelinetosh site.

And I’ll be doing it in this color.

Did the swatch and was spot–on for stitches per inch across with a Size 7 needle (20 st = 4” wide) but am a wee bit under for length. Should be 26 rows = 4 inches – on my swatch, 26 rows was only 3.75 inches. Uh, I may have to add a few rows which will be no problem for me. Directions call for 7 skeins of yarn; I have 10, so there’s room to play – and I always have to add length to sleeves and prefer a longer sweater body.

Here’s the swatch:

I’m loving this color!! See the little bumps on the bottom? There’s 7 of them. In case I have to change needle sizes, and then forget which swatch was done with what needle, I put purl stitches in, 7 bumps for a size 7 needle. I’ll be casting on tomorrow night, when it’s quiet here and I can count!

Tonight, I’m watching the Grammy’s, just watched Adele sing Rolling in the Deep!