Petunia rambles on and on….

In the evenings, I knit. I like it, and it’s relaxing. And most often, I have my iPod handy and ear plugs phones in. I’m listening to knitting podcasts, or music or Onion Radio News, or an audiobook.

Pop often watches TV, and it’s almost always “educational” in some way. Just some light-hearted entertaining fluff is never on HIS television list. It’s the Learning Channel or the Discovery Channel. He always has to be learning something. Most often it’s the History Channel. (Prior to getting the iPod and plugging in the earphones, I felt like I was sitting for an unwanted History degree). The iPod enables me to blot out the one remaining fact about WWII that has escaped me all these years, and the one remaining item in Egyptian pyramid facts. I don’t know if I’ll survive without them, but I’m willing to take that chance.

Last night proceeded normally. Dinner is over, I’m knitting on the twins’ sweaters and listening to my podcast of choice; his eyes are glued to the TV, one hand petting the dog, the other desperately clutching the remote control. I guess he fears that someone will sneak in, overpower him and, oh, God, the worst possible thing that could happen when a crazed felon breaks into your home — (Play JAWS theme here) someone could grab his remote and change the damned channel. Anyway, that’s normal, all is as it always is.

Daughter goes by heading for the kitchen, and makes eating motions in my direction; I nod. We don’t even have to speak anymore, or risk obscuring a historical fact about Pearl Harbor.She’s saying, in sign language, “Would you like a bowl full of cold and tasty cholesterol?” and I’m replying, “Yes, thoughtful and beloved daughter, I would love to have just a wee taste of Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough, but only a small bit, as I’m most concerned about my health and my weight.” Intuitive daughter correctly interprets the sign language and brings back about 3 or 4 scoops in a large cereal bowl. Like I said – all’s well in my world. I shut down the iPod, pulled out the earplugs, and sat back to enjoy my ice cream.

And that’s when I found out that it’s all going to hell in a handbasket — and rather soon. According to whatever gem of wisdom he was watching, the ancient Mayan calendar says that Doomsday is scheduled for Dec. 21, 2012. It’s that specific, right to the date. Now I’ve heard of these different religious cults where the members have gone out and sat on a mountain top, waiting to get sucked up to heaven, and then, in the morning, they came on back down and made breakfast. But according to this, it’s ALL gonna end. Not just for a few believers. Everything’s going.

Thinking about this made me forget about my ice cream for a bit and it started to get mushy.

First thoughts weren’t too happy. My children, my grandchildren won’t get to grow up, or grow old. So many young ones won’t; so much talent lost.

And then…..

1. How soon before The End can I just say Screw it, and stop paying the mortgage?
2. How much yarn could I charge to a credit card, and just pay the minimum amount until The End? I could knit with all those expensive fibers that I can’t afford to buy now!
3. Yarn? Hell, charge cruises, trips to Europe. I always wanted to see Bermuda, Scotland.
4. And sure as seagulls do shit, I ain’t wasting time or money on Christmas shopping that year.

Sorry, but if I’m going out, I’m gonna have fun before I go. And I’m gonna get my nails done, too.

When I got home from work last night, I must have had that “I don’t feel like cooking” look on my face.  So Pop thought it was a lovely idea to take me out.  Smart man.  His choices were go out to dinner or PB&J.  Nearby is a Chinese Buffet and the food is always good.   We ate a shameful amount, as usual.

When we left, we went up to Best Buy.  Now that a decision has been made and it appears that Blu-Ray has come out over HD as the winning format, we’re thinking of getting a player.  We are told that playing the current collection of non-Blu-Ray DVDs on a Blu-Ray player will enhance them.   Guess that remains to be seen, but we went up there to look at the selection available.  If we get a player, though, we’ll need at least one real Blu-ray disk to evaluate the difference, so we better look around over there, too.

Our Best Buy always has a “greeter” – it gives a very Wal-Mart  home-y feeling, and then an open area, then all the aisles of goods.  We walk in and as usual, I head over to glance at the iPod stuff.  I don’t know why, because I’ve already spent so much on iPod accessories that I should be able to claim the damn thing as a dependent on my income tax.

Out of the corner of my eye, I see what appears to be a young man with a real problem.  I don’t mean a “troubled soul.”  I mean, Oh God, this kid is having a fit.  He’s thrashing around and flailing his arms and flinging himself from side to side.  And no one seems to be tending to him, or running to give him any assistance.  And you know how you hate to look, but you can’t turn away, so you try to look without appearing to do so.  Well, I’m doing a lot of that,  and feeling really sorry for the guy.  And still, no one’s helping.  Geez.

And just as I’m about to cause a damn scene over all this, something intelligent drifts into my brain.  Like…..   If no one else is getting excited, maybe, just maybe, uh, there’s nothing to really get excited about??  And I hear this pounding sound.  Actually, a really annoying damn drumming sound, and it’s coming, perhaps, from over near that kid.  So I inch closer.  And then closer still.

And this damn kid is really drumming!!  Really. Thumping.  Waving his drumsticks.  Looked like he was having a damn seizure.  Seemingly playing to a crowd that, other than me, simply isn’t there.  Finally, I vaguely remember a game that Son#2 brought down with him when he was home at Christmas.  He hooked it up to my big TV, and he and SIL stood in my living room with their plastic guitars, pretending to play.  I assume this was some contest/game to find out which one of these grown men could play this “color game” the best, or the fastest, or the most accurately.  Little progress here since CandyLand for either of them.   Anyway, apparently, this game has gone a step further, because I finally got up to where I could see what would appear to be 4 drums.

Still mystified, I wandered off in search of DVDs, and as I read titles 3 aisles over, I contemplated what I wanted to do with those drumsticks, what I would do were Son#2 to ever try bringing this “TV Drum Game” into my house.  I wondered about the house where this young man must have practiced this skill.  Are they all insane over there?  What parent would buy such a thing?

Being so very UN-knowledgeable of these things, I sent a message to Son#2 today, asking if there was now a game like his guitar game, but with drums instead??  I got back a message telling me to look up “Rock Band” on the internet.

These kids are so smart these days.

They better not bring it here!

I like to knit socks, and even more than that, I like to wear hand-knitted socks that fit well.  So what if I had some “fit” issues in the beginning – how else do you learn??  Y’all can stop laughing now.

Like most everyone else, I started making socks using DPNs (double pointed needles).  I can use this technique and really don’t have any major problems with it   Minor issues are that DPNs slip out the easiest, causing dropped stitches, shrieking, lost DPNs.  Bamboo needles are less slippery than metal, but still….   I won’t go so far as to say “They don’t travel well” cause 8 million people will say that they take DPNs everywhere, but certainly, you run an increased risk if you tote them about.  DPNs dropped under a car seat are difficult to retrieve when the car is moving particularly if you are driving.   And then there’s the dreaded Second Sock Syndrome, one of the most difficult disorders to overcome, when you get bored with the project right after finishing ONE sock, and never start the other.

So when I heard about 2 socks on 2 circs, I was right up front to try it, and found it a great improvement.  As I frequently carry a sock project and a lot of other shit around with me, this method had appeal.  I would lose less DPNs and drop less stitches.  Gaping stretched-out stitches where needles joined were minimized, too; a good thing.  AND with 2 socks going at the same time, when I finished one sock, I was only one row away from finishing the other.  I started turning out PAIRS of socks more dependably. More often.  Using 2 different skeins at a time presented no difficulty for me. I insist on fairly frequent breaks, for soda, potty, just to shake my fingers about to avoid achy hands.  Each time, I untangled.  The only problem I had with the method was having 4 needle points dangling about was just a tad bit, uh, fiddly.  I don’t know.  Not bad, really, just fiddly.  I never got them mixed up, always started and ended with the right ones.  It was just those dangly, fiddly bits hanging.

So last week, I had sleeves to do.  I’m making raglan sweaters for 2-year-old twin grandsons, so I had 4 that I was doing in-the-round.  I did the first one with 2 circs, picking up the stitches that way and knitting them seamlessly.  When I woke up at the end of the sleeve and started #2, for whatever reason, I picked up all the stitches onto one Addi circ.  Oh, damn, I really need to pay a wee bit of attention once in a while.  And I held it, and looked at it, and then remembered that I have a Magic Loop booklet in my “knitting book stash” that’s separate from my knitting yarn stash and my roving stash and hey, there’s a way of doing this on one needle.  Being too lazy to drag my fat ass off the couch search out the book, I just pulled the needle this way and that until the method came back into my head.  And I was off.

Hey, now, to me, this was better than “2 socks on 2 circs” because it eliminated all the dangly parts.  I’ve done several sleeves that way, (twins = 4 sleeves) and I like it.  And I figured that if I could do one sock that way, surely two socks can be done with the Magic Loop, too.

But how in the hell do you get it started?????   I just don’t know if I’ve got the patience to start and restart 29 times until I get it all figured out. 

Today I found this tutorial, full of explanations and pictures.

Two Toe-Up Sock on One Circular Needle

It is so truly wonderful that I put a link to it on my “Things I Don’t Want to Lose” page.  Cause I’m that dumb.  Ask any of my kids.  They’ll tell ya.